MishBir OS || Dear Angry Chorni || YRHPK || Yeh Rishtey Hain Pyaar Ke

"There is a charm to letters and cards that emails and smses can't ever replicate, you cannot inhale them, drawing the fragrance of the place they have been mailed from, the feel of paper in your hand bearing the weight of the words contained within. You cannot rub your fingers over the paper and visualise the sender, seated at a table, writing, perhaps with a smile on their lips or a frown splitting the brow. You can't see the pressure of the pen on the reverse of the page and imagine the mood the person might have been in when he or she was writing it"

― Kiran Manral, The Face at the Window

Dear Angry Chorni

I know at this very moment you are frowning because of the way I have addressed you but I can't help it because for me you will always be my angry, violent chorni who stole my heart. That day you asked me why I loved you and I told you that I am lucky to have you in my life. Today, give me the chance of telling you why I thank God every day for making you. I still remember the day you waltzed into my life. It had been 21 days since, I had left home but for me that was the norm. You see I was like the free bird who couldn't be tamed by his own mother. So, I used to go on these solitary excursions and surprisingly, rather than being at home, I felt more at peace when I observed other people or when I somehow could help people solve their problems. I was clicking pictures when my camera lens managed to capture your eyes and you instantly hid your face by bending down. You tried your best that day to hide your face, but your eyes not only had left an imprint on my camera, but their allure had captivated my soul as well. There was just something about them it felt like those brown orbs were full of mysteries and I couldn't help but feel like unraveling them. You compelled me to ask "Tasveer main kis ka chera hain" and I just had a feeling that this was going to be the start of something new "Ya koi kahani shuru hui hain jis main naam humraha hain" . When I turned my attention elsewhere you slowly walked towards the front and sat with your back towards and then music started playing and ah well you know me I couldn't help but dance to the beats and at this one particular moment I was almost about to fall but you held my hand making sure that I don't fall. I should have known there and then that you will always be there catching me, holding me together when I fall apart. I did thank you that day but instead of saying you are welcome like normal people do you told me "Haath samblnay kay liay diya tha thamnay kay liay nahi aur waisay bhi jab apnay hi chod kar chalay jayay toh haath thaamnay ki adaadt nahi rehti" I won't shy away from expressing that what you said hit really hard. I couldn't help but reminisce how baba had let go of my hand in childhood and how he had abandoned me and I knew for sure that even you had experienced a similar kind of pain. The very same day I heard you telling Ketki that she was blessed to have such a loving family and that she had no idea what it felt to be left behind by the ones you loved.

"Tumhay koi idea nahi hain kaisa lag ta hain apnay papa kay liay wait karna jo shahid kabhi nahi ahayay gay" Ketu might never know but I do. I know how it feels to wait day in day out hoping against hope that the one person you have looked up to for the most part of your childhood would walk through that gate and would embrace you in a hug. I had waited on the foyer as well and I knew how much it hurt. Ironically, the second time I met you was due to pain as well. The atmosphere at my place due to Ketki's Godhana had been stifling so I stepped out trying to divert my attention from yet another day where my Maa had managed to manipulate things in her favor. While reciting my shayri I was flicking through my camera gallery when again your picture piqued my interest"Kia koi aur hain duyna main jo meri tarah deewana hain" and right on cue your voice echoed amongst the ruins and than you and I started our hide and seek game. You managed to locate me behind that pillar and than like the stubborn angry chorni you are you decided to leave warning me that I would be sorry if I tried to follow you but do you remember what I told you that day "Shaid upar walay nay mujhay aap ki madad karany kay liya bheja hain ya phir aap ko meri in short Upar wala hum dono ki help kar raha hain" you scoffed at the idea that day and in your haste you managed to drop your earring and as I clutched that earring in between my palm I just knew that somehow those words would come true. You had indeed helped me that day because witnessing your pain, playing that game with you had managed to make me forget my own pain and I have never thanked you for that. It was at night time near that mandir when I first got too see my violent angry chorni in all her glory and I couldn't help but admire your fierceness. I wanted to stop you but and even smeared your face with color but than you looked at me and this one lone tear fell from your eyes and you said "Galat toh woh tha jo ho raha tha main toh bas ussay sahi karnay ki koshish kar rahi hu" and I just knew that you were telling the truth. The very next day we met for the first time where you challenged me that "Aaj main tumhay apnay rang main rang dun gi" and you managed to fulfill your end of the bargain. You are right when you say that one should never underestimate Misthi Aggarwal. I could go on and on about how we kept meeting again and again and how slowly and gradually you managed to creep through the deep crevices of my heart but there are a few things that I can't help but mention it is your ability to see beyond my mask of indifference. That night at the mandir when I was trying to tell you that you need to let go of the past you stumped me when you said "Tum bhi apnay Baba ko yaad kar kay itna sad mat hua karo" and you managed to silence the boy who loved talking. There was a chink in my armor and you had managed to seep through the crack I however, wasn't prepared to let anyone in so I immediately diverted the topic. When Ketki's wedding was called off I set up camp near the lakeside that I often used to visit with my father. Misthi that day I really missed him and I just wanted him to come back so when you kept a comforting hand on my shoulder I couldn't help but embrace you in a hug. I was so overwhelmed with emotions that it took me a moment to register that at such an odd hour of the night you had sneaked out just to check up on me. No one in my family had stopped me when I was leaving, they hadn't even bothered to ask me if I was okay but you did and honestly it meant a lot. No one had shown me that amount of care. With your arrival my mood lightened up and I started cracking jokes but one thing I said still holds true "Tum awesome ho" you have no idea about the affect you have on people. You don't even know that how that concern of yours made me feel on cloud nine and the way you deliberately lost the race just warmed my heart. You called it your friendship ka discount but what it meant to me is indescribable. I have got to admit though I am a teeny weeny bit scared of your anger that you showed in full force when I got arrested. The whole car ride I dared not say a word because it felt like you would just skin me alive not only did you drive my car but you also had the audacity to lock me in it. I asked you the reason and you pointed towards by bruised knuckles and once again Angry chorni you surprised me. You told me how my uncontrollable anger invariably end up hurting my friends who care about me and then I asked you that why were you so concerned about my friends and you replied with all the haq " Kyun kay main bhi tumhari dost hu" and just like that you managed to left me speechless. That day you showed me that my well-being mattered to someone that day I knew that in you I had found a true friend or maybe just maybe something more than a friend. Than you started working with me and completely took over the exhibition preps. The way you carefully handled my paintings and my photographs and the way you managed to display them making sure that their beauty wasn't diminished just made me admire you little more as none of my family members had ever offered their assistance. They hadn't looked at my art with the same glee and excitement. The way you showcased it made my art look even more beautiful. On one end I was helping Kunal in wooing you and on the other end I was falling for you. No wonder when Parul Maasi asked me to paint from my heart I filled the canvas with your picture. A chorni who without even me knowing it had stolen my heart but at that time I felt my feelings were forbidden as you were promised to someone else. My dreams and hopes were futile but when the fire broke out that day and the foolish you decided to stay back to save my painting, I realized that I was in the deep end. My feelings for you were too strong because a mere girl without fearing for her own safety had walked into a room full of fire trying to save something that was precious to me. No one had given me that much importance and here you put your life on the line for me. I tried to stay away from you but somehow you knew that something was bothering me and on the day of the godhana I came to meet you one last time and you gave me your diary. You asked me to jot down what I was feeling and as fate would have it I accidentally picked up your personal diary. While I was leaving the city I flicked through the pages of your diary and I realized that all the things you admired about Kunal were actually done by me so it wasn't Kunal for whom you had feelings for it was for me. I felt elated I finally felt I had a chance and so I raced back to try to tell Kunal the truth so that he would call off the engagement, but you beat me to it. You broke the ristha your own self by citing some very valid reasons and I understood that you and Kunal were just not meant to be. A part of me was afraid that after knowing that I had done all those things for you instead of Kunal would make you give up on our friendship. A friendship that was slowly becoming the best thing that had happened to me in a while. I couldn't afford to lose you. I was so desperate to talk to you that I even got a phone just because you had asked me on numerous occasions to get one. The champagnr trip couldn't have come at a better time as I got the perfect opportunity to say sorry to you. Remember our bus ride the whole journey was a laughter riot and with a jolt I realized that travelling solo now will never have the same charm as travelling with you by my side. I had almost given up on you accepting my apology after I missed the bus a part of thought that you had left but imagine my surprise when I saw you walking up to me struggling to drag that scooter. To say I was happy to see you would be an understatement I was elated beyond measure. Someone had finally stayed back for the boy who had been left behind. Our scooter ride is one of the most beautiful memories of my life, I am glad that my jokes managed to make you laugh and that day I wished greedily that the journey would never end. When we reached the school site you again astounded me with the way you handled everything not for a minute did you flinch while looking at the dismal state of the school. No, no my angry chorni is a women of action who encouraged my team and I to pull up our socks and to get to work. Oh btw when I fake proposed to you that day each and every word of that proposal was true.3

 

 

"Qismaton ki mujh par yay pehli mehrbaani hain

Aik shezadi jis ka chasma hi uss ki nishani hain"

I just can't thank fate enough for playing its cards and for introducing me to you because Angry Chorni you have completely transformed my life. When Kuku got kidnapped I asked you to not to follow me and to out yourself in danger but I should have known better. Of course my angry chorni had to be all daring and bold as she arrived unarmed, all alone to the lion's den in order to save all of us. When I saw you in the hands of those captors I was willing to give up Baba's land and his dream because your life mattered more to me than anything else and somehow you understood my intentions without me voicing it and you kept on asking me to stop. Angry chorni if that day that guy had asked me for my life, I would have gladly given that up for you as well because for me nothing else mattered. He had you and he was about to hurt you there was no choice to make. It was you and it will always be you. In the next moment when the gun shot 's noise echoed in the air and you fell to the ground a part of my heart stop functioning. I couldn't fathom what I would have done had something happened to you that day. I know that you are the bravest girl I have ever met but please be careful and be mindful of your safety because after all it's not only you that you need to take care of but its also my heart that is yours for eternity. You broke your promise that day and put yourself in a situation that could have had dire consequences so generally I was angry at you because I just couldn't come to terms with the fact that how could you think that your life is so indispensable how could not see that your safety was the only thing that mattered to me. I however, could not stay mad at you for long as you used my very own shayri against me and managed to mend our friendship. Afterwards both of us desperately tried to bring KUKU closer and somehow in the process even you and I got closer.

Misthi I don't think I have thanked you enough for saving my life that night when a cyclone wreaked havoc in our city. Once again without caring for your own life you ventured out alone to see if I was okay. I can't even tell you the relief that coursed through my entire being when I saw you through the car window. A part of me had accepted the fact that I am going to die as I thought that no one would come for me but yet you did. Just earlier that day I had express my conviction that whenever I needed help my painting wali would never shy away from helping me and you didn't. I don't know what super-human strength had possessed you that day as you broke the window and managed to get me on the cart right in the nick of time before my car exploded. Everything after that is a blur but I remember waking up to you sleeping on my bedside and at that moment I realized what true serenity actually is. You held on to my hand so firmly that even when I tried to remove it from your grasp I was unable to do so. Than you woke up and I pretended to be asleep and in my sleep induced haze I asked you to stay with me forever. You began chiding me for stepping out in such dangerous weather and expressed your fear on what you would have done had something happened to me and at that very moment I dropped all pretense and asked you the real reason you came to help me out. You diverted the answer and got an opportunity to slip away when my family came. That day I became sure of one thing that the feelings we had for each other were mutual and so I began my quest of making you realize the true depth of your feelings and for also showing you my love through actions rather then just my words. When Bade Papa told me that you had left for the airport I felt like my whole world had been blown to smithereens. Nanu may god bless him reminded me of how I still had time and how you hadn't left. So, angry chorni I raced to the airport clad on a white horse such a stark contrast to the boy who once said that "Kitna impractical hain kay koi prince charming safed godhey par ahayay" to which you had replied "Mainay kabi aisay sapnay nahi dekhay kyun kay meri life koi fairytale nahi hain" that day both of us were proven wrong as we lived our very own fairytale. I took you to mandir because I wanted to confess my feelings for you at one of the most purest places ever , a place where God resides as I wanted Him to witness our love. As I have already said that you managed to live up to your end of the bargain and I will repeat it here "Tumnay mujay apnay rang main rang hi diya , Angry chorni I love you" apart from all the reasons I have stated I can give you a million different reasons but every day since our confession you leave me spell bound with the amount of love you shower on me. Recently, when Kunal insulted you publicly once again I apologize for his idiocy not once did you get angry at me although you had every right. Instead you asked me something that I had never expected it was something that no one had ever asked me. I know for a minute you hesitated because you know how sensitive the topic was for me but that hesitation didn't stop you asking if you could assist me in trying to find my father. No words can encapsulate what I felt when you asked me casually if you could help like it was the most normal thing ever. I couldn't help but fall in love with you all over again. I was so overwhelmed with your gesture that I just hugged you because as I already said words could never convey how grateful I felt for having you in my life. I know that now with your support I will find answers to all my questions.

So before, I sign this off I want to say thank you. Thank you for loving me back. Thank you for teaching me that sometimes in the process of saving other people we forget that we need saving too. So, thank you for saving me both literally and figuratively. Thank you for making this banjara realize that while a house can be made out of brick and mortar a true home/ghar can only me made when all inhabitants of it experience the same amount of happiness and pain. That home need not be a place sometimes home is a person. Thank you for being my person. A person that I am not ashamed to show my real self beneath my mask. Thank you for being my biggest support system and helping me with things that I never asked your help for. Thank you for making me realize that I am enough to make someone stay for me to make someone root for me. Thank you for making me realize that I am worthy of you sneaking out and jumping of walls just to meet me. Thank you for making us a part of a modern day Cinderella story. I don't know what the future has in store for us but I want you to know that I am deeply and irrevocably in love with you. I don't need a reason to love you for me its as easy as breathing for me its something worth living for.

Forever under your spell

Your Ajeeb Rajvansh

Suno remember how I once told you chori karna buri baat hain well when you robbed me of my heart I realized that "Kabi kabi dil ki duyna main chori karna achi baat hain"

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